'Baddha Konasana' photo by LollyKnit

“A good goal is like a strenuous exercise -
it makes you stretch.
— Mary Kay Ash

One of the best yoga classes I have ever attended was actually geared towards preschoolers. I was in my late teens at the time, working in a kid’s gym inside a full-service fitness facility. One of the yoga teachers at the facility started offering morning yoga classes to the little kiddies in our department so whichever of us was on duty at the time would not just supervise, but also join in. And it was great!

Because the class was broken down into a simple form that the young kids could understand and get excited about, I found myself picking up small details of yoga that I don’t think I would have noticed otherwise. And the one piece that really stood out to me is that the teacher would have the kids first sit in a basic seated position (see above) and lean forward to see how close they could get to their nose to their toes. Then, after doing a few minutes of other simple yoga poses, she would bring the kids right back to this first seated position to see how much further they could stretch. It was a great way to show the kids every few minutes a concrete example of what these stretching exercises were doing for their muscles, how much more flexible they were becoming.

This is not only a great lesson in goal planning, to stop and check in to see how far you’ve gotten in personal and professional goals, it’s also a great reminder to stop and celebrate how far you’ve come in any area of life. In the same way that increasing muscle flexibility takes time and can’t be hurried or forced, I believe that overcoming unwanted habits or thought patterns should be warranted plenty of time and patience for the mind to expand into new ways of working.

Say you want to stop being judgmental or beating yourself up internally. This is something that most people do and have done for their entire lives. Which, of course, means that it’s not the easiest thing to just quit cold turkey! I’ve found that it’s helpful if I go in small steps — any time I catch myself thinking “what a stupid thing to do” or “ack, that’s just like me to [insert frustration here]” I take a moment to change that thought. It’s easy to fall into a pattern of, “man, why did I make such a bad decision there” to “oh crap, there I go being all negative again” to “shoot, I was gonna stop being hard on myself” to “why am I still failing at my goal of changing my thought patterns” and on and on and on…

Instead, with the idea of changing that thought without falling into a spiral of even more frustration, I think of the example of yoga and stretching and how just a few minutes every day can make a difference over the long run. And this gives me the space to realize that by grabbing that “what a stupid thing to do” thought and changing it to something along the lines of “hey, I tried something new and learned a helpful lesson along the way” I’m working little by little to expand that big ol’ brain of mine into new ways of thinking and being over time.

'Solitaire' photo by Adriane Dizon

“Only those who will risk going too far
can possibly find out how far one can go.”
— T. S. Eliot

I think games offer a great opportunity to practice various skills that can be helpful in life. I’m often reminded while playing various solitaire games that it’s a great chance to practice levels of risk taking that I might not go for quite so quickly in life in general. And not only that, but it’s a great time to practice risk taking along with a great sense of detachment as to the outcome! Risk taking, detachment, patience… these are like the giant cherries on top of the fun!

The title? I don’t think anyone should ever have to say that. Sure, we all have tough times and sometimes in life it seems that the only paths open to us are those that include doing something we don’t enjoy just to put food on the table.

But, really? I think that each one of us is given natural gifts and talents that lead us to professions that allow us to grow, thrive and absolutely love what we do for a living.

The trick sometimes? Taking a leap of faith and stepping forward into what we love — even if it doesn’t promise to pay much, even if it’s scary and against the grain, even when all odds seem to be against us.

In the long run? It totally pays off.

'Delays Possible' photo by Heather Luxion

“If you wait to do everything until you’re sure it’s right,
you’ll probably never do much of anything.”
— Win Borden

It’s been a great experience this month, choosing to go at least one new place every day. It’s gotten me to think in new ways — both about the places around me, about traveling to places afar, and about life in general. I love that once a goal or idea is put in motion, it often changes and adjusts in unexpected ways! Case in point…

I was supposed to drive down to Savannah, GA with a friend last week to visit my dear friend Anya. This would mean four days of driving in total to get down and back (breaking it into two days of driving each way), with about four or five days of visiting (two of which were going to mean more driving so Anya and I could head over to Atlanta to visit some friends). A whole lotta driving for just a few days of visiting, but it was the cheapest way to go and I hadn’t flown in about nine or ten years (and had developed a definite fear of flying in the meantime!), so I had become pretty comfortably set in my “roadtrip mentality.”

Until last week, that is! I should also share two other things at this point, the first being that I have long wanted to be one of those people who just decides to travel and then goes for it — just packs a bag, jumps on a plane and jets off! And, I also had a band of friends (literally) who were only going to be in Atlanta until Wednesday morning, so I’d be missing them by just a few days when I finally got to the ATL that following weekend.

Can you see where all of this is leading? Late Monday night things fell through with driving down to Savannah so I slept with thoughts of trying to figure out how on earth I was going to make it down to Georgia. It was a restless sleep that eventually led me to dream out this one particular segment, clear and in color, over and over again: I was in Atlanta, walking into a teahouse owned by good friends of mine, surprising the traveling band of friends down there by arriving while they were still in town. I awoke with one clear question — Should I really do it?!

I can’t say that my decision came all that easily (I “see-sawed” back and forth as I packed), but it did come quite clearly when it came right down to it. I put aside fears of flying, questions over how I was going to pay for it (really, our ties to money can be SO frustrating at times!), and went for it! I flew down to Atlanta that afternoon with my sister Anna (if you’re gonna be crazy, why not do it as a group?!), buying our tickets online just moments before sliding my laptop into my suitcase and running out the door to get to the flight on time.

And, it’s one of the best decisions I think I’ve ever made. It was a moment of, “If not now, when?!” and I’ll always be grateful that I went for it. As I said, it’s inspired me to think of life in expansive, new ways. I’m all the more aware of our capacity to overcome our fears now than I think I’ve ever been, I see just how easy it is to become “that person” you’ve always wanted to be by just jumping in and doing (really, you can do it! just trust and go for it!), and I had a fantastic week surprising friends, meeting new people, and adventuring about the Atlanta metro area. Trust and courage hand-in-hand? Awesome.

photo by Chris Metcalf

I was thinking yesterday about the fact that all it really takes to make most situations completely different (read: hopefully better!) is about a second. As I mentioned in my last post, I’ve been making a point of checking out at least one new place each day during the month of June. And it’s been great fun so far! It takes me outside of my usual daily routine, makes me look more closely at the places around me (always gotta be thinking about new possibilities!), and has made for some fun adventures already.

Which leads me to the subject of this post: Taking a moment to make a positive change.

Yesterday I decided to stop in at a new massage therapy place that opened up near me a while back. I’ve been looking for a new massage therapist for quite some time now and, while I tend to search out an individual vs. a business for something like this, the place looked nice, so I thought I’d give it a try. When I walked in, the woman at the front desk was on the phone. When I walked out a few minutes later, the woman at the front desk was on the phone.

Now, I’ve been a receptionist/front desk manager — both at a relatively quiet construction company and at a very, very busy gymnastics academy — so I know firsthand how difficult it can be to juggle phone calls and walk-ins and people waiting. And, I figured out right away that it makes all the difference in the world in someone’s day, especially if they have to wait for you, to just take a moment to look them in the eye and acknowledge their presence. Countless times I’d look up from my phone call, acknowledge the presence of someone who’d just walked up to my desk, put up one finger to let them know it’d be a minute, and mouth to them with a “thanks for understanding” smile, “I’ll be right with you.” And it was huge.

Had the woman yesterday done the same for me, I would have happily waited to chat with her for a bit, to get a better sense of the place, to find out answers to my questions. Instead, without that acknowledgment, I just grabbed a few pieces of literature to answer my main questions, waited awkwardly for a moment, and then walked out with an image of the place being rather cold and unfriendly (definitely not something I want in a place to help me relax and relieve tension and stress!). Had the woman yesterday taken even half a second to just look up from her call and nod at me, I would have happily waited and I would have left with a completely different view of the place.

Ah well, here’s to being aware of those seconds, those tiny little pieces that can make all the difference in the world in the day of the people right in front of us… and to taking the time to acknowledge those people in them!

'Goal Setting' photo by Angie Torres

For the last few months I’ve been setting a particular theme for each month, with corresponding goals to match said theme. March was all about health and wellness (goals included taking a 15-20 minute walk first thing every morning and adjusting to waking up earlier). The idea behind April was widening my local social circles, so goals included trying new social outlets and going out for purely social purposes at least two or three times every week (trying to meet at least three new people at each place!). And May brought about major spring cleaning, finishing off old to do lists, clearing old beliefs, and other such greatness with the theme of cleansing. (Good stuff!)

Annnd, now June is all about going to places I’ve never been before. It can be anything from checking out local spots that are new to me (today was pretty chill with a visit to the one branch library I’d never been in before) to traveling to, and sightseeing in, whole new areas (I’m headed down to Georgia for about a week or so near the end of the month). Early summer-like weather here has brought about an intense desire for new adventures for me, so this is my way of fulfilling that desire on a daily basis (without, you know, having the ability to jet off to a new country each day!).

Part of this goal for June also includes keeping myself accountable and tracking my newly visited spot (or spots) each day by posting something about it, either over on twitter or here on this blog (depending on how newsworthy — or not — it really seems to be!).

photo by Heather Luxion

I was thinking about expectations today and the fact that they really can be both good and bad (at least for me!). I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve set myself up for disappointment by putting all these expectations of greatness upon another person, a trip, a particular event or situation, etc. only to realize after the fact that if I’d gone in without an assumption that things were going to be “epic-level amazing” or “the best thing ever” that I would have been able to better enjoy the situation at whatever level it came in at.

After contemplating my own feelings of frustration at expectations and wondering if it really is a bad thing to have them in all cases, I decided to scrounge around online for inspiration and other viewpoints. Here are two quotes I found:

“The best things in life are unexpected -
because there were no expectations.”
— Eli Khamarov

“The expectations of life depend upon diligence;
the mechanic that would perfect his work
must first sharpen his tools.”
— Confucius

I think these two viewpoints together best sum up my own conclusions on the subject: that like so many other things in life, having expectations takes walking a fine line of balance and moderation. It’s a mixture of having hope without being too attached to the outcome of the situation (balance of hope/expectations and detachment/flexibility), of dreaming and wishing for what you want while also following these aspirations up with hard work and effort to make them happen. Ah, life, you do keep us on our toes!!

I’ll end with one last quote, one that has reminded me to “just be” and let things unfold naturally:

“Never idealize others. They will never live up to your expectations.
Don’t over-analyse your relationships. Stop playing games.
A growing relationship can only be nurtured by genuineness.”
— Leo F. Buscaglia

Just how I like it, Leo. Straight up honest opinion, no frills.